Late night thoughts

Thought I would make an attempt to update my blog today. I can't sleep so we will see what the brain comes up with as this late hour.

I have made an observation. There are several blogs I read often...the one common theme is that the writers of these blogs all have children. I wonder if I would have more to write about if I had children? I guess it made me a little sad as well...cause you see we have been trying to have children for the last 4 years. God has not blessed us in that area of our lives and we are at peace with it all, but sometimes things still make me sad.

At this point there is nothing anyone can really say...I have read all the books (from christian writers re: infertility), seen doctors, given it to the Lord, taken vacations, relaxed, etc. I truly believe the Lord has closed my womb for a reason. I do have expectant hope though each month that God will create a miracle in me. If you look at the women in the bible that were barren and then gave birth their children went on to do amazing things for God...so my joy comes in knowing that maybe God is preparing the way for a great man or woman of God that I get to be the mom of!

My husband and I have talked about adoption and are open to it. The strange thing to me about it though is the cost...Gladney in Fort Worth ranges from $20,000 to $40,000 depending on the ethnicity of the child. Minority children cost less...can you believe that is even possible...to be honest with you it makes my skin crawl. Society puts value on life based on skin color from the very beginning. We really do not feel led at this time to seek out a child...however if the Lord brought a situation to us that would be another story.

So I guess that is what is on my mind as this late hour. I think I am finally tired.